It’s no wonder so many gays live in south London with all these opportunities to grab some fresh air and meat. Just past Balham, lies another little enclave of depravity. Head up Bedford Hill and leap into the woodland on the left-hand side before you reach the railway bridge. If you get lost, just look out for the guy stapled to his smartphone – who knows, he may be ditching Grindr and seeking directions for some real-time, no messing, hardcore fun – just like in the old days…